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Thief’s excuse: I’m saving my life

A River Falls patrol officer spotlighted a 25-year-old Madison man during the middle of the night Sunday, Sept. 1, as he tiptoed out the back of the Riverview Motel, 100 E. Spring St. The alleged thief held a picture and a life preserver.

Asked what he was doing with those things, the man said he needed his life saved.

Later the man, a recent UW-River Falls graduate, said he was only being funny, that he and some buds had crashed in the hotel’s unlocked, dark pool room, used the hot tub, and that afterward he removed a picture from the wall and the life preserver before leaving.

The stolen items were recovered undamaged. The man was given a $240 citation for theft of movable property and a 1:30 p.m. Oct. 2 Municipal Court date.

River Falls police also:

--Arrested a 17-year-old girl for disorderly conduct at Positive Alternatives teenage group home, 2860 Williams Ave., over the Labor Day weekend. The girl allegedly was pushing and punching with another girl on a back deck as staff there tried to intervene.

The fight apparently started when one girl took the other girl’s toothbrush and wiped it on her buttocks.

--Arrested a 37-year-old local man for disorderly conduct downtown after midnight Friday, Aug. 30, for allegedly swearing at and insulting patrons at the Corner Saloon, 128 N. Main St.

An officer claimed to find the man in the Main Street median across from the saloon confronting a woman and yelling that she was a dyke and a lesbian. The man allegedly told the officer he could call anybody he wanted a lesbian and refused to say anything else.

He was booked at the police station and given a $177 citation with a 1:30 p.m. Sept. 25 Municipal Court date.

--Arrested an 18-year-old local man for illegal entry into parked vehicles in the neighborhoods just east of River Falls High School and for methamphetamine possession late Saturday afternoon, Aug. 31.

The man, wearing all black with a black hood, was stopped in his car near the intersection of Knollwood Lane and Lilac Avenue. Told to get out, the man kept saying not until police called his lawyer. An officer replied that police don’t call lawyers, but that the man might have a chance to call one himself later.

Officers say they found a bag of meth sitting in plain sight in the front of the man’s white 1999 Mercury Sable. The car was towed and impounded, the man taken to county jail in Ellsworth.

--Arrested a 24-year-old local man for domestic disorderly conduct Sunday, Sept. 1, after 11 p.m. in the 300 block of North Second Street. The man said he had had an a anxiety attack, wanted his roommate to drive him to the hospital, but that his roommate, hanging out in a bar, had taken too long to come for him.

There’s more. Find it in Police Beat of the Sept. 5 print edition of the River Falls Journal.