Letter: Obituary: Buck, Bruiser B.On November 21, first day of the Wisconsin deer season, by a hit and run slug.
By: Rick McMonagle, Eugene, Ore., former executive director, Kinnickinnic River Land Trust, River Falls Journal
On November 21, first day of the Wisconsin deer season, by a hit and run slug.
Longtime resident of Big Swamp.
Son of Big Buck and Sweet Ol’ Doe.
Survived by wives: Doe, Doe-Doe, Doe Rae Me, Do-Si-Do, Doeminique, and Doe Hickey.
Offspring: Dough Boy, Buckaroo Two, Spikey, Four Point, Daisy, Doelanda, Doeta, Fawny Mae, Fawnsy, and Four-score more.
Mates: Racko, Stud, Points, Neck, Buckaroo, and Rutman.
Member: Loyal Order of Men, Homo Sapiens II, Stag Club, Hat Rack Society, Saltlickers of America, Does Forever!
Veteran of Deer Wars I, II & III, The Big Drive, I-94.
Bruiser was a loyal friend, awesome stud. He enjoyed pawing the ground, snorting, shadow boxing, alcoholic apples, playing chicken with semis, and staring into headlights with his pals.
He rubbed antlers with foreign dignitaries including Cow, Beefalo, and Longhorn.
His favorite song was “Blood on the Tracks” by B. Dylan.
He will be truly missed by all poor shots.
In lieu of cards, flowers, corn, apples are preferred.
May He Rut in Peace.
This poetic letter is dedicated to the late Bruce Foster, an outdoorsman and descendent of Joel Foster, mid-19th century founder of River Falls.